Back into the blogosphere after a brief absence. July took a toll on us emotionally, physically and electronically. We are slowly gathering ourselves on all fronts.

Electronically broke as the laptop keyboard gave up to the water D spilled on it.
Physically rough as all of us except naani were sick almost all of July. cold, cough, double dose of mastitis, diarrhea as a side effect of antibiotics. To top it, I got diagnosed with umbilical hernia needing another elective surgery. [A loaded post to follow].
Emotionally drained as the amazing lady, D’s naani headed back to our homeland last week, the toughest to deal with.

The house feels haunted especially during the day with naani leaving, D going back to day care, Dlittle sleeping and H going to office. It has just been a week without her and it already feels like decades.

I had been prepping D in this regard. But then D being D, who thinks the world is under her feet and everybody around her is obliged to her needs, kept saying Naani is not going anywhere.

The day before naani is scheduled to leave, me and D go to the mall to pick up some stuff. On the way, me and D have a heart-to-heart mom-to-daughter conversation.

D : Mummy, where is naani going?
Me: She is going to India betu.
D : Why mummy? Because I doing bamaashi(mishcief). I will go home and tell naani naani I will be good girl. Not do bamaashi.
Me: Na beta. You are a very good girl. She is going because naana is alone there and there is nobody to make food for him.
D : Naana is alone? [pause]When she will over with mummum then she will come in the night and sleep with me, mummy.
Me: hmm… Naani has to make mummum today, tomorrow, Saturday, Sunday. All the days. Naana does not know to cook.
D : Mummy, I also not know to make mummum. Then naani will come here to D house and make mummum. Yes, mummy?
Me: hmm.. ok here is the deal. Mummy will make mummum for D and papa. Naani will make mummum for naana. ok? Who would you want to make mummum for D? Mummy or Naani?
D : [So much for the kids attention span, or maybe she does not want to choose]. Look at. Two Two bus mummy. That my pink school bus.

We shopped happily for an hour and came back home.

The day arrives. Before I even woke up, Naani has put the remaining teeny-bit load of laundry in the washer, cooked for the day, loaded the dish washer. When I opened my eyes, I saw her in my room with a cuppa chai. [I should say the 2.5 months she has been here, almost every day I woke up to the smell of chai). I am carefully avoiding to look into her eyes as the water geyser in both our eyes are overflowing ready to gush out. D and papa get ready to go the airport, I am making sure she has packed everything, the passport and medicines in particular. The moment comes. H starts the car, puts D in the car seat and is waiting. There goes, all the water in store. Naani kisses me on the forehead and says, bachon ke saamne nahi rote. (Not to cry in front of kids). You are a mother of 2 beautiful kids now. You should enjoy every moment. Khush raho. Smile on both our faces and she leaves.

Her flight gets delayed by 2 hours, sitting in airport thinking of her grand daughter, she finally could not resist temptation to call home and check on D. D tells her, Naani, u are going to make mummum for naana. Make 1 mummum, 2 mummum.... 5 mummum fast fast and come to my house.

Later that night, when D gets ready to sleep, she tells, lets wait mummy, naani will over mummum and come and then D will sleep with naani. You go and sleep with Dlittle, Dlittle is alone and she will get scared. Felt the lump in my throat and kept reading her story book. D then says, Mummy D didi is sad today. I ask her Why beta? Mummy is here with you and mummy loves you very much. She says mummy can you read Dora and boots story for me? Hugs me and sleeps.
She woke up at 3am screaming the monster bit her. I thought in reality some bug had bit her and stripped her and the bed to find nothing. When asked where the monster wwas, she says it came out of her leappad Boo-Monsters inc book into her sappa(sapna - dream)!! Makes me wonder how their brain works and how they can relate things.

Day 3:
She is comfortably talking to naani over the phone and is doing ok. However, she is starting to settle her emotions with Dlittle. Few statements that shocked me and H.
- I will not bite her mummy.
- Open your eyes Dlittle. D didi wants to play with you. [Fiddles with Dlittle's eyelids].
- I ask her not to bother Dlittle as she is sleeping. I get back – ‘You are killing me mummy!’
Where is she learning all these from?

Day 4:
Happy big didi again. Happily conversing with naani over the phone, not once asked about her coming back. She is just giving updates on her sister, day care and every thing under the world.

Day 5:
couple of times she has asked for naani and why naani is not coming bak. The she tells herself naani is making mummum for naana beause he cannot cook.
Now, she wants Me and only Me to rock her to sleep just like I do Dlittle.

Day 6:
We even managed to find time to go for a walk, all four of us. It felt great, felt like a sane family again.

So, life is settling, I am learning to be more patient(or just plain patient) and more tolerant. I am dead tired at the end of the day. Both the kids are sleeping, H happy in his office chatting with his offshore team. My back bone is about to break, yet there is some sense of accomplishment and immense satisfaction

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