Comments on: A regular trip to the park

By: DDmom

DDmom — Sat, 14 Jun 2008 03:51:00 +0000

WIAN: Kids observe us and imitate us more than we think they do. They just reflect our behavior for the most part. That’s why I feel the need to get out of my comfort zone and do things I would want them to do

Pumpkin’s Mom: Aww.. Thanks. Hope to see you here often.

By: pumpkins mom

pumpkins mom — Sat, 14 Jun 2008 03:07:07 +0000

Hi DDmom, I have been a silent reader for quite sometime. I love reading about D and Dlittle, your talk with D has really taught me something about dealing with such situations.

By: whatsinaname

whatsinaname — Sat, 07 Jun 2008 07:06:27 +0000

My daughters went through the same and I had to drill these very words into them which you spoke out to D; even though I was tempted to go and lash out at the bullies! I wonder what the parents of the bullying children teach them! X-(

By: DDmom

DDmom — Mon, 02 Jun 2008 19:09:33 +0000

DotThoughts : Does he say it though? I am yet to see D being able to speak out.

Orchid: Yes. It is much easier to teach kids to stand up for themselves than at an older age. The older they get, the more conscious they get.

Gauri: That’s the issue. How to help them understand the balance, the fine line between being nice, but at the same time being aggressive when the other person crosses the line. Joys of parenting

By: Gauri

Gauri — Mon, 02 Jun 2008 01:23:42 +0000

Pretty much the same situation here too DD Mom. Another kid barges in or gets physical with this guy and he too keeps mum. Abha put it well when she said we need to teach our kids “constructive aggression”. But then again, when I tell him not to just sit quiet when someone gets aggressive with him physically – his response is “but it is not good to hit or push other people.”. (*sigh*)

Like UTBT says, I too am scared for him – he starts Primary School late August.

And yes, you did the right thing in having that little talk with her.

By: Orchid

Orchid — Fri, 30 May 2008 17:34:33 +0000

well…all of life’s lessons have to be learnt one way or another and there is no time like now to start…
u did the right thing!

By: DotThoughts

DotThoughts — Fri, 30 May 2008 17:26:56 +0000

I would have done the same. Many times older children hit Chip and he says nothing. I have told him to say “No hitting” in a loud voice if someone hits him.

By: DDmom

DDmom — Fri, 30 May 2008 17:25:42 +0000

utbt: I know what you mean. Hopefully Chula will learn to assert herself and talk it out instead of holding it within. It hurts to see kids like this at such tender age.

K3: Lets see

Maggie: Your so right. I did feel tempted to walk right in, and I have done it few times. I realise, letting her handle the situation by herself will help her in the long run. But as you say, its not easy going that route. Also, to balance and not get too aggressive either is a challenge.

~nm: aww.. ~nm. Thanks.

Abha: yup. So right. It’s almost like you don’t have a choice. But, standing up for yourself is something everyone should do, either subtly Or aggressively, whatever works with your personality.

swati: I read the post you mentioned. Aryan seems to have a wonderful sense of balance. He let it go few times, but when he realised that wasn’t helping, he went aggressive. Very impressed.

By: Swati

Swati — Fri, 30 May 2008 09:56:42 +0000

I think we all had been in similiar situations. I learnt from your post , what i can do when Aryan is of D’s age. I did a post on the same topic , when Aryan was too young to be explained.

http://myamusingmind.blogspot.com/2007/07/to-hit-or-to-sit.html

By: Abha

Abha — Fri, 30 May 2008 07:20:55 +0000

lovely post! with everyone becoming little more agressive with each apssing day, i guess we have to teach the kids contructive aggression too!

this will be defi useful when Kabir grows up! which is anywayz happening too fast!

cheers!

By: ~nm

~nm — Fri, 30 May 2008 03:55:30 +0000

Awesome talk you had with her. I have learnt a few lessons myself on how to handle such situations!

By: Maggie

Maggie — Fri, 30 May 2008 02:49:00 +0000

It’s hard – so hard, not to jump in and fight their battles for them. But you did the right thing….I’m sure the next time D stands up to something like this she’ll feel really good about herself….

By: K3

K3 — Fri, 30 May 2008 01:54:01 +0000

Aww!!! Tht just sucks!!

I do hope D follows your instructions next time around and is at least able to say her mind.

By: utbtkids

utbtkids — Thu, 29 May 2008 19:32:19 +0000

Awww, poor D.
But it happens all the time.
Next year Chula goes to the big kids classroom and I am worried for her. She is the type that will quitely bear something, suffer and keep it to herself. End of teh day she will be in a very bad mood and direct her anger on me.
But Mieja is another story. She is a regular fire cracker. Worst case scenario, she would atleast give an ear piercing scream and let people know that she does not like it.